And just like that, we are onto week two of our lockdown. I’ve officially been inside my house with the girls for 20 days straight and on one hand, the time is passing by so quickly, the girls keep me busy, distracted and exhausted but at the same time, this feels like it’s going on forever. Will we ever start to feel safe again? Living in this state of heightened anxiety is difficult and it feels like it will never end -doesn’t it? This week I’ve tried (mainly unsuccessfully) to keep on top of my emotions and throw myself whole-heartedly into activities with the girls, cleaning the house and we invested in Disney+ so watching trashy movies like High School Musical has been a great distraction too. (Here is how our first week in lockdown went if you missed that)
This week we’ve fallen into our lockdown routine and most days have been similar – a busy morning filled with crafts and activities, play in the garden, a quieter afternoon with a nap for Pearl and a walk. The evening starts with the daily briefing from the government, which I watch every day without fail, then cleaning the house, bath, bedtime, dinner and usually a trashy movie. I’ve stopped watching the news past 6pm or I’ll have a terrible nights sleep. I spend the evening working on my blog, watching movies or having a bath to try and zone out from the world for a short while. I think it’s so important to educate ourselves on the news, but know when to switch off too.
29th March – SUNDAY
We decided to have a very quiet Sunday, Violet was meant to be at a birthday party so I felt sad she was missing yet another day out. I’m amazed at how well she’s taken all of this in her stride. We watched Trolls in bed with cups of coffee and just snuggled the girls tight. I love that they are both old enough now to enjoy all sitting together in the mornings, it makes things a lot calmer – they only last twenty minutes but it’s usually enough time to get in that first cup of coffee, so that’s something! We spent the day just pottering around the house and doing our daily walk around the block.
30th March – MONDAY
We were determined to make Monday a good day as V was booked off work as we were due to be visiting Chessington World of Adventures, which was Violet’s main birthday present. It was lovely to have V with us at home but sad we couldn’t go so Violet asked to ‘bake a pink cake‘ so we did just that! She had a great time baking, making a mess and licking the bowl.
I, on the other hand, had a really tough day. I’ve been losing out on work since the beginning of the Coronavirus outbreak, but on Monday I lost a really big job I’d been counting on and really looking forward to starting. This was the week I was meant to be starting a ‘new chapter’ in my life which would be a significant change for me – Pearl would be at nursery and I’d be using my child-free time to work on this massive freelance writing contract and instead, it had all gone down the drain. I struggled to pull myself together as I felt so low about it. I’ve worked so hard to get to this point where I’m self-employed and can afford childcare for both girls and it’s fallen apart in the most unexpected way. I had a long bath that evening to wallow in the sadness of what could have been but managed to perk myself up on the prospect that when this is all over I can slowing piece things back together, there will be other contracts, jobs and campaigns. At least we are all healthy, that’s all that matters at this point.
31st March – TUESDAY
On Tuesday I threw myself into children’s activities to take my mind from everything. We did tin foil painting in the garden, watched Disney movies and went for our long walk.
Having V working from home is really nice – I try and keep the girls away from her as much as possible as she’s on a lot of calls and conference video calls, but just having someone else in the house helps! I pop in with cups of tea and slices of cake throughout the day to keep her going and just feel so much better that she isn’t in an office all the time.
1st April – WEDNESDAY
On Wednesday Violet and I made Elmer the elephant out of milk bottles, we went for our walk and Pearl suddenly looked so grown up! I put her hair in a little ponytail and suddenly she looks like a proper little girl, I’ve also noticed her speech is coming along quickly, maybe us all being at home together is helping her – she says things like ‘oh dear!’ ‘thank you!’, ‘up and down’ and ‘yes please!’, she’s also saying so many more single words like doggy, cheese, teddy, milk, car etc. I just feel she’s able to communicate so much more these days, it won’t be long until she’s chatting away – I just know it.
I’m so pleased the girls have got each other during this time – they have been getting closer and play together a lot. Their favourite thing to do is rough and tumble and jump on the sofa, I can’t believe how boisterous they can be with each other, but they seem to love it!
2nd April – THURSDAY
When we woke up to the sound of rushing water on Thursday I thought things surely couldn’t get worse, but it turns out they could. We went into the bathroom to find water pouring out of the shower unit and were unable to turn it off. I then panicked as I realised we are going to have to call someone out and have someone in our home – we’ve been isolated for 20 days now so I really didn’t want to break our safe space, but luckily we have a plumber we know and use a lot – I called him and he was able to come straight away. He was very good with making an effort to socially distance within the house, which felt a bit odd but needs must for us all. Our shower was broken but will be fixed next week, at least water wasn’t pouring everywhere anymore!
I had a slow day with the girls after the stress of getting the bathroom fixed – we watched Disney movies, made pizzas and had our walk. Another email dropped into my inbox cancelling another long-term job I’d been working on which was another blow but I tried to keep my spirits up.
3rd April – FRIDAY
On Friday V had to go back into work so I felt a huge panic that she was out of our ‘safe zone’ and in the office. When she left I felt an absolute sense of panic and felt I really had to pull myself together to continue with the day and keep positive for the girls. I had a coffee and got the girls dressed, made their breakfast and decided to get the Playdoh out – that always keep us all busy and girls just love it! I stayed busy and the day passed quickly, plus I kept reminding myself that it was nearly the weekend….
V got home from work and I made her laugh by squirting her with disinfectant spray in the front garden, which was a bit of a joke really.
The Tesco shop came – the food shop takes forever now as I clean and disinfect all the packaging before putting it away in our cupboards and then have to clean the kitchen too. Maybe a little over the top, but in my book you can never be too careful and cleaning helps me to feel more comfortable. The food shop brought lots of yummy treats, including our Easter Eggs (which were all in stock – yay!) so we cooked a ‘fake-away’ dinner and broke into one of the Easter treats for pudding. I did question what my life had become as I held my Easter egg at arm’s length with surgical gloves as I cleaned the packaging with Dettol, but at least obsessive cleaning keeps my mind busy!
4th April – SATURDAY
On Saturday V woke up and told me she was feeling poorly. Of course we both panicked – could this be ‘IT’?! After taking her temperature numerous times and sending her back to bed we realised it was nothing, just exhaustion. It’s an intense time, high anxiety, long working hours, the girls going stir crazy – we are bound to be feeling frazzled and that’s all it was. Phew.
Just as that panic was over, Violet decided to throw herself headfirst into the radiator and got the BIGGEST bruise on her forehead. I thought we might be off to A&E but she seemed okay after sitting with a cold compress on her forehead – honestly, this week is trying to test me! Baking another cake was the only cure for a challenging week.
With everyone on the mend and feeling better by the afternoon, the sun was shining and everyone was starting to feel a lot more positive. We got the bouncy castle out and I sat in the sunshine in the garden, just slowing down for the moment and taking in the fresh air as the girls played. I decided with work out of the window I’m going to stop worrying about it until this is over, just take each day as it comes. Keeping everyone safe, well and happy is the priority – the rest will follow.
So, it’s been quite a week. We’ve had ups and downs, highs and lows but we are still healthy and for that, I am eternally grateful.
How has your week been?
Ahhh Lindsay what a week you’ve had! I’ve been struggling a lot too, this is so hard to be isolated and confined. I’m on week 4 of working solely from home & only going to the shops for essentials. I haven’t been getting my daily outdoor exercise every day, more like staying in for a few days solid, getting grumpy & panicky & then having a bike ride to make me feel better. I was really motivated in the first week or so because it was just like normal freelance life without the coworking space (which I miss soooooo bad). I was doing loads of home workouts and trying to build structure into my day but now I’ve stopped exercising, am drinking too much and miss my friends and my city terribly. Luckily I still have *one* contract still going thank god but that finishes in may then who knows.
We were meant to be exchanging and completing on our first flat too which had to be delayed – I just hope we can afford to go through with it and pay the mortgage when both on 80% of our money for a few months if I can’t find freelance work.
What crazy stressful times we’re in! There are some plusses too though which I figured out as I wrote my Lockdown Diaries blog last week. Stay safe and well and see you on the other side! Xx