Tackling my Mum-body hangups and finding my best ever fit! | AD

Making peace with my new Mum body has been such a difficult thing to do. Not only does my body look and feel completely different to how I was before – until recently I have had a total disconnect with it too. It feels like for the past 3 years, my body has centred around conceiving, growing, birthing, feeding and nurturing two children. I have been through two gruelling rounds of IVF which followed with two pregnancies – only 8 months apart! That is so much to put your body through, but it’s done amazing, AMAZING things. I couldn’t thank it more as there are two beautiful new humans now on the earth. But this whole process has left me feeling like my body is no longer my own. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I have no idea who that exhausted, depleted woman is staring back at me.

This is something they don’t often tell you about in motherhood. Losing yourself is really, really hard and when you throw yourself into your children, you often don’t realise it’s happening either. It had got to a point where I had no idea how to look after myself, enjoy my body or feel good anymore! Scraping my hair into a Mum-bun, picking up the same old jeans and jumper of the floor from the previous day would become the norm. Who even was I these days?

With Pearl about to turn 8 months (and don’t worry – no more babies on the horizon this time!) I realised it was time to reclaim my body back, it was time to get to know and love the body I have now and start feeling good again. For me, the first place to start was with a great pair of jeans.

I’ll make a confession. Until recently, I’d been wearing maternity jeans for 3 years full time. Yes, even the months I’ve not been pregnant! I just haven’t braved anything else and had buried my head in the sand when it came to embracing my new curves. I told myself one day I’ll be back in my pre-baby jeans, but that was a bad move as it only added to my guilt and sadness that I wasn’t. Plus, with maternity jeans – when you get used to that stretch, it’s hard to go back!

I had absolutely no idea where to start in creating a new look. When you are a busy Mum, you don’t have time to endlessly try on pairs of jeans in search for the perfect fit – I have such short windows of time to get EVERYTHING done, maybe I might fit in a quick browse online during naptime, if not that means bracing shopping in town with a toddler – we all know how THAT situation is going to pan out. So, it’s fair to say not only is finding the perfect jeans is hard as a Mum as you are pushed to the limits for time but you have a whole new shape to get used to as well. Double Whammy!

So, when I heard Marks and Spencer had launched a new collection of jeans with the ‘Best Ever Fit’  I knew this would be right up my street. They are described as “Super soft, figure flattering denim with a no-gape waist” which sounds just perfect. For me Marks and Spencer are also a trusty British brand that we all know and love. I just knew they’d have my back and it would be a one-stop shop for the perfect pair of jeans (plus a packet of Percy pigs too).

The new collection comes in a three different styles –

The Ivy Skinny,  the pair that work with EVERYTHING, amazingly soft and figure flattering, a cotton blend for added stretch and comfort.
 – The Lily Slim with a leg-lengthening slim fit, perfect for dressing up or down
– The Sienna Straight – a super comfy casual style with a sleek finish

I knew before I  tried them on, the Ivy would be the one for me and I wasn’t wrong! I’m a huge fan of the skinny jean, they are my go to style. I am a pear shape – I always have been, but even moreso since I’ve had the girls. I used to try and hide my curves in baggy jeans, bootcuts (even flares in the depths of my teenage years) but I’ve learned over time to embrace my curves and enjoy them. My curves, mum-tum and all the bumpy bits inbetween are something to be proud of – my body tells a story, so that is something I would always want to show off.

I have been desperate to find my style again, so I’ve teamed my new Ivy Denim with a gorgeous Ruched Sleeve Blazer in Almond – this is SO flattering and comfy – for me it hides a multitude of lumps and bumps around the Mum-tum area, a casual white top. Lastly, I’ve finished the look with Zebra Print Slingback Shoes for a pop of bright pattern, which really makes this look stand out. I’ve always loved bold colours and prints so it was great to feel like ‘me’ again.

I think there are a few points to think about when you are looking for your first pair of jeans after a baby…..

  • Be kind to yourself – your body has done amazing things, don’t judge it for being a different size or for having lumps and bumps you didn’t before.
  • Embrace your new size and shape – You are gorgeous and a superwoman for creating humans!
  • Find jeans that are super comfy and stretchy – being a Mum involves a lot of sitting on the floor, bending down, running about, going from softplays to nurseries and everything in between. You want a jean that will see you through it all and is super comfy too.
  • Look for denim that can be dressed up or down – this look is perfect for a coffee meet with Mums, a blog event or dinner out – team it with some trainers and take off the blazer, I’m ready for the softplay!
  • Ignore dress sizes – They can vary from shop to shop, just try on a few different pairs and stick to the ones that are the most comfy and flatter your figure. A dress size is just a number.
  • Ditch your pre-baby jeans – you may have a new body now, embrace it! Plus, you deserve a treat and something new!

Since finding my perfect pair of jeans and starting on my journey to love my new body, I’ve been feeling so much more like ‘me’ again. It’s going to be a while until I can say I’m 100% at one with my body again, but I’m on my journey now and am enjoying embracing my new body more than ever!

 

Author: Lyndsay Gardner

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  • You look amazing! I have been struggling with the exact same thing, and the idea of embracing my new curves is slowly becoming a reality but it is hard when you don’t feel you look good in anything. I have always thought skinny jeans the most flattering thing for my figure but I struggle to find a pair that have the right amount of stretch that they feel like jeans but don’t look like leggings, but these look perfect! Might be doing a sneaky M&S order on payday…yes in a bigger size than before, but let’s face it, I’ve not got a lot of spare time for the gym at the moment so my arse is staying this size a while yet, might as well dress it nicely! xx

  • You look very chic – I definitely didn’t look this put together when I had two under two! But yes M&S Jeans are just the best – I’ve been wearing them since my early 20’s and had a chat with the lady behind the cash desk last week when I bought a pair about how I’m not sure why they’re not more popular! The pair I bought was Β£19.50 and fit perfectly – you pay twice that in Topshop and they don’t last past a year! Plus the different leg lengths is so handy in M&S.